How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
home. puking in laundry basket.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Randomize
