Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
