So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
as a side note pls kill me
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
