We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
