I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
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You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
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Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
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