She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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