i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
