his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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