just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
True strength comes from lack of pants
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
