Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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