And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
