The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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