The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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