I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
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sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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