I'm really into asian looking animals
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
