Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize