I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
