He asked to "fluff my boner.."
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
