Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Randomize
