i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
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