What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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