I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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