do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
