1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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