Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.