I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
