Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize