How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize