Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
