we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Randomize
