No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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