The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
