never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Randomize