Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
