just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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