i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Send help, water and tortillas.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
