: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
