U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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