He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
