How'd it feel making her break her religion?
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
