I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
