i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Randomize
