I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
