Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
