it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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