Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
