I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Someone signed my nipple.
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