Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
So much Jack, so little girl.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Randomize
