i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
