So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Dicks are not precious.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
