After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize